Monday, July 28, 2008

she never wanted it. ever.

I was out with my friend Chris and we ran into one of his friends on the street. They began talking about the previous evening, the party they attended, and the girl their mutual friend had taken home with him. All was pleasant until Chris’ friend uttered the sentence, “Well, good for him. That girl wanted it.”

“That girl wanted it.”

I’m pretty sure the minute you say that, there is good reason to investigate the possibility of you being a rapist or soon becoming a rapist. You can’t say a girl “wanted it.” You can’t say that, ever. It’s just bad and wrong.

Chris and I talked about this. When is it okay to use that phrase? When?

NEVER.

Even if you were at a restaurant, the man is ordering, and he says, “Oh, and an extra order of fries. She wanted it,” as he points to his girlfriend- it’s still awkward. It doesn’t work. Guy goes over to friend’s house, criticizes his choice of wall paint, and his friend shrugs his shoulders and says, “Well, she wanted it!” Nope. Still weird. Even if a woman came up to you at a bar and said, “I want it.” You take her home, and you say to your roommate, “She wanted it. She said she wanted it!” Nope. Still bad. Still rape-y.

Try it. Try thinking of a conversation where that phrase is okay. It doesn’t work. Ever. Was it ever okay? Probably not. And it never will be.

So in case you’re reading this, and that is something you’ve said, knock it off. Or everyone will just assume you’re a rapist. She didn’t want it. She never wanted it. Gross.

*PS. This blog motivated by total frustration with misogynist d-bags, like friend of friend above.